Nine years ago, I was picking up the pieces of my life.

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Corporate had knocked me to the ground.

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I found myself divorced, in poor health, and missing my kids.

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That’s when I found something I wasn’t looking for.

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It was a book: The Obstacle Is The Way, by Ryan Holiday.

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Not only was that book tremendously helpful in turning my trials into triumphs, but it gave me my first living 

“professional” hero.

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We all need heroes — people that can “pull” us forward, especially in our dark times.

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With a prolific nature, Ryan has championed the modern rebirth of ancient Stoic philosophy — a practical system I revisit daily to live my best life.

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But it’s not the 15 books he’s written. Instead, Ryan (the person) has influenced me the most.

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Studying and emulating a hero

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He doesn’t know it, but I’ve stayed “best friends” with him over the last decade.

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Our relationship has evolved. We’ve gone through four phases so far.

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1. Philosophy

Stoicism helped me become emotionally bulletproof. These days, I don’t waste my time on what I can’t control. Instead, I’m living in gratitude and courageous action. Check out The Daily Stoic for all of Ryan’s material. 

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2. Writing

My father instilled a love of writing in me, but I long struggled to channel it. Ryan’s prolific nature (producing at least one book per year and sending daily emails) gave me focus and a high bar. I’m now shipping daily content to the world and will release multiple books in the coming years.

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3. Entrepreneurship

While writing is Ryan’s trade, it’s clear he’s developed impressive business acumen. He’s growing an empire that serves the world and knows how to leverage it. 

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But beyond selling millions of books, he:

• Runs his own local bookstore
• Sells (high-profit) physical products
• Commands high-ticket speaking gigs
• Monetizes his podcast and newsletter
• Provides coaching and community services
• Runs an impressive online content ecosystem

Stepping back, I see the impressive system in action. At the core, it’s him — his personal brand and the Stoic life he champions. This strategy is a guiding light for me as an entrepreneur.

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4. Parenting

I have four kids, and I want to be the most loving, supportive, and impactful dad I can be for them. So seeing Ryan’s devotion to his two kids ignites a fire within me. And his Daily Dad content has been immensely valuable.

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Wrap-up

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I definitely go through phases when studying Ryan and my other heroes. We’ll spend time apart for months and then rekindle our relationship (again, only I know this).

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I’ve internalized so much of him that I often catch myself speaking like him or asking, “WWRD?”

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These are all healthy signs that I’m doing the work to study and emulate my heroes.

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We must have heroes in our lives (dead and alive).

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And we must do the active work to engage with them.

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That’s the only way they can “pull” us forward into the career and life we dream of.

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So, who are your heroes?